My friends call me Grief

This piece was inspired by C.S. Lewis and his amazing ability to portray the enemy in our lives with his famous book "The Screwtape Letters".

A lot of people near and dear to my heart are grieving right now. I wrote this for them, from the perspective of Grief itself. An un-welcomed visitor that we all must entertain at least once. Friends, I want You to know You aren't alone. I see you. I see the depth of sorrow behind your eyes, even when you're smiling. More importantly, El Roi, the God who sees, sees it too and wants to walk with you. Don't grieve alone. Invite Him in. My deepest condolences to every last one of you. Not only to those who've lost loved ones, but to those who've lost a piece of themselves you think will never return. Your joy WILL return one day. Until then, may this piece bless you and set you on your way to healing and freedom for your soul. May the light in your eyes return and shine brighter than it ever has before.

-Kimberly

Hey, look if I’m being honest, I don’t want to be here just as much as you don’t want me here.  Maybe you’ve been expecting me but didn’t know what I’d look like when I showed up. Maybe you didn’t expect me so soon. I’m sure you would’ve preferred more time to prepare for me.  But I’ve been sent to you, because I’ve got a job to do. I’m at your door and you can’t delay this anymore.  I’ve knocked and patiently waited.  I’ve thrown rocks and rang your bell, and I’ve thought about crashing through your window, but that’s not how this works. I think you know that full well.  You have to open the door and invite me in. I know you see me standing here, and even if you don’t, my presence is so strong it demands to be felt. Not acknowledging me doesn’t make me go away, in fact in kind of ensures that I stay. I know you’re afraid to open the door but the sooner you do we can get that precious heart of yours up off the floor. If it brings you any comfort, I’m letting you know that I’m not meant to stay, but I also can’t leave until you hear what it is I have to say. Imagine my dilemma. Always sent to where I’m never received, but what if I told you, you've been deceived? I do have some good news to tell, because believe it or not, I want to see you well. I clear a path for acceptance to come behind me and then healing isn’t far behind, see? That’s who you really want me to be.  Who would you rather greet in my place? Is it peace, love, joy or maybe more grace? They will surely come, and when they do, you’ll open your door with much more gratitude. 

Webster’s calls me “Deep Sorrow”, but my friends call me Grief, and if we don’t meet today, I'll just linger around until you're tired of me constantly getting in your way. I’m strong enough to handle your punches, curses, sobs and screams. If you’d rather sit in silence, we can do that too, as long as you let me in and I’ll simply sit next to you. Now that we’ve met, you’ll never be the same, because now that I’m here, you realize that this thing called life isn’t a game.  Most times I pack my bags for long stays, but for once I’d just like to pack for a few days. Yes, I'm here for a reason, but if it were up to me, I wouldn't stay for longer than a season. I know you don’t want me at your door, but I visit everyone at least once in their life, sometimes more. So please remember the promise of Psalm 34.  “He is close to the brokenhearted, He rescues those who are crushed in spirit.” With my arrival, you have immediate access to the only One who will be your survival. There’s no way around feeling what I bring, but eventually He will fill your void and take away the sting. I know you weren’t ready to say goodbye and your healing will come when you let go of your need to know why. Be careful not to get stuck in any of my five stages, or you'll have an unwanted houseguest for ages.

Despite what you've been told, it's ok to embrace me. Ignoring me is what keeps you from being free. I give you permission to GRIEVE. The childhood you never had, and the child you never got to hold. The parent or sibling you won’t get to see grow old and the anniversary date you’ll never get to celebrate. You’re allowed to grieve seasons past and friendships that were never meant to last. Grieve the life that you always thought you’d have and just keep holding onto His strong right hand. I know I’m heavy, but that's because you were never meant to carry me alone, but instead hand me over to the One who sits on the throne. Only then will you experience a peace you've never known. I will get lighter each day, because remember, I’m not meant to stay. Please don’t make me stay. Let’s just talk, and I promise you, I’ll be on my way. 

Signed,

Grief